Maupay has already rattled Maddison and Walker

The Premier League has been transformed into the Neal Maupay Show now and Arsenal, Chelsea and Liverpool should prepare for his unmatched brand of housery.

You know, the Premier League turned into the Neal Maupay Show so gradually I didn’t even notice.

But there can be no doubt about it now.

He’d always been there or thereabouts, of course. An easy punchline if you wanted to drop a non-scoring striker into conversation and had already used up Richarlison.

And if you’d asked us to come up with a non-scoring striker who would suddenly go on a hot streak and combine that with becoming the long-awaited Heir of Lamela as the Barclays’ sh*thouse-in-chief, a position that has gone unfilled since the great man’s departure, then Richarlison would absolutely have been our choice.

He’s done the hot streak bit impeccably with nine goals in his last eight games having managed just two in the previous season-and-a-half. Good content, for sure, but if anything he’s toned down the housery of his first season at Spurs. Perhaps it’s something to do with Brennan Johnson now being team-mate rather than antagonist.

Anyway, it’s left an unexpected opportunity and it’s one Maupay has grabbed with both hands.

The first half of the season passed as one might have expected for a player who built his Barclays career on not scoring goals for Brighton and then not scoring goals even more notably at Everton.

So impressive was his Everton non-scoring in fact that a reasonable case could be made that two goals in the first half of the season was actually quite a lot.

But now he’s doing bits every week. He’s scored in each of Brentford’s last five games, including their last three in the Premier League. And now he’s absolutely dripping in main character energy. It’s a stunning transformation.

Neal Maupay mimics James Maddison in Brentford’s defeat at Tottenham

A player with Maupay’s top-flight record over the last couple of years appropriating James Maddison’s darts celebration after scoring the opener against Tottenham was first-class trolling. Tellingly, Maupay still managed to emerge with the upper hand even after Spurs predictably hit back to win 3-2 because Spurs quite often hit back to win games after going behind and Brentford nearly always go on to lose after taking the lead.

Maupay isn’t worried by such matters. As Spurs celebrated each of their three goals by showing just how rattled they were by Maupay, whose own celebration had been met by Maddison trying to bring his big roast dinner energy into an alpha hug and not quite pulling it off, the main man himself knew this was something far bigger than three Premier League points, which are basically worthless in the world of housery.

Maddison’s crucial error came after the match when announcing to the world how rattled he remained by saying Maupay didn’t have enough goals for a celebration of his own. Maupay simply took to Instagram to note he has ‘more goals and less relegations’ than Maddison, thus effortlessly also dragging grammar pedants into his web. Truly we are in the presence of a master.

Both men ended up looking quite ridiculously precious about what is at best a 5/10 way of celebrating a goal, but the difference is that Maupay wanted this and Maddison didn’t. Even in defeat, he was the winner.

Another game, another opening goal. This time against Manchester City. Of course City turned it round because they are even more adept than Spurs at such tasks and Brentford are, as previously discussed, Brentford.

This time, though, it was Kyle Walker in Maupay’s sights. It was lucky the Daily Mail were on hand to deploy one of the lip readers they keep on retainer to seemingly solve the mystery of just what a sh*thouse like Maupay could have said to upset Kyle Walker at the present time. Nothing sprung immediately to mind.

Maupay denies the charge because of course he does, but that’s immaterial.

What matters now is that he has our attention. And some spectacular upcoming fixtures in which to work. It’s Wolves this week, which is on the face of it unremarkable. But two games in this improbable five-match scoring streak have been against Wolves in the cup, so he’s presumably got at least half their team bubbling already.

It also yet again highlights another great thing about this scoring/housery run, because Brentford ultimately went out of the cup to Wolves. His goals aren’t even doing Brentford much good in terms of results. Two goals but still out of the FA Cup. Two opening goals in subsequent defeats to Spurs and City. Only one of his goals has actually helped Brentford get a result – against Nottingham Forest. He’s working at levels so far beyond such trifles as results and points and progressing to a fifth-round FA Cup clash with Brighton.

But after that Wolves game the opportunities for Maupay to really strut his stuff come thick and fast. He’s got Liverpool, City again, crisis club Chelsea and Arsenal still to play before the next international break in mid-March. If he hasn’t turned every Arsenal supporter into a fully paid-up member of the Celebration Police by the end of that game then he will have failed himself and us.

He won’t, though. We have every confidence. He’ll be our player of the year by then. He’s close already.