Will Thomas Tuchel sing the national anthem? WTF would he?
The English media get a pummelling from the Mailbox, which asks them not very politely to f*** off.
Send your mails on any subject to [email protected]. Howās your mood?
Why the f*** would he sing the anthem?
City fan here. Personally, I think the Tuchel appointment is a good one. But, if the hysterics in the English media are anything to go by, then heās in for a sh*t ride. In his FA presser yesterday a journalist and, presumably, a grown and relatively well-educated man, actually asked him if he (Tuchel) would be singing the English national anthem. Not whether heād be playing three at the back or how heāll be looking to solve the Palmer/Saka roles etc. Oh no. Letās pin him down on the vital issue of whether heāll be singing God Save the f*cking King at Wembley.
WTF would he? A foreigner? And what kind of sh*t-for-brains moron do you have to be to ask such a dumb-ass question in the first place? Itās also why the cynic in me thinks that the reason he wonāt start until January is because the next two England games come in the week after Remembrance Day and you just KNOW that the knuckle-draggers (both in the media and the crowd) would be losing their collective sh*t over both the anthem AND whether he would/should be wearing a poppy. FFS.
There is a genuine conversation to be had as to why there are no elite English coaches around but that, apparently, is not what we should be focussing on. Of course it isnāt. And isnāt it interesting to note that there almost certainly wouldnāt have been anything like this furore had it been Guardiola announced as manager yesterday? And you can bet your bottom dollar that no bottom-feeding journo wouldāve asked HIM about the national anthem.
But why is it an issue with Tuchel? Hmmmm.
Oh, and for the avoidance of doubt, I sing the anthem, and I wear the poppy and am unashamedly proud to do both.
Mark (Blimey. Havenāt ranted like this in a mail for years). MCFC
ā¦The response of the red tops was the usual barrage of disgusting tropes but, alas, not surprising. The notion that England somehow owns the game is a continuation of that 1800ās upper-class twit disdain for the ālittle manā and, more so, Johnny Foreigner.
In reality, it was the Scots who modernised the game to something closer to what we would recognise today, gave the toff teams a hiding and were the ones who brought the game to the rest of the world. England, on the other hand, was quite happy to live in isolation, assuming a wasp-ish superiority that was destroyed by first the US in the World Cup and then Hungary.
Our media perpetuates an image that drives others to hate us. Sure, they do it for the money, for the clicks, but there is an inherent sense of self-righteousness superiority that has never gone from Victorian times.
The pearl-clutching over Tuchelās signing, because he is German, from the same red tops that prostrate themselves at the feet of the king or queen, who are essentially a German dynasty, is absolute top-class hypocrisy. The same media that would barrack an English-born player because he is black, trying to pull up English-born Carsley over the anthem ā and an anthem devoted to a German family, is ludicrously hilarious.
That any of those papers have the temerity to label the section as sports is beyond me. And to quote a prior emailer, they can all go f*** off.
Paul McDevitt
Itās a multicultural game
In the midst of its ostensibly āconsideredā (but still sadly xenophobic) commentary on the new England manager, the Telegraph says that any trophy won would now be a victory of āthe great German coaching cultureā, presumably implying that success under a child of Albion would be purely and reverently English.
Itās just a ridiculous and very conscious discounting of todayās modern, multi-cultural game. Our talented boys have themselves been developed to their current high standards by the coaching of a Spaniard (Foden, Stones, Saka, Watkins), an Italian (Bellingham), a German, goodness gracious (TAA), a mix of cultural influence (Kane, Palmer et al.), and even, dare we say it, an Englishman (Gordon). A victory in a major tournament would be a victory for a melting pot of tutelage. So why not access it the same way ?
Paul, Atlanta
Why donāt English coaches go abroad?
I was initially surprised by Johnny Nicās āEngland manager should be English or itās cheatingā article until I got to the bit about it being down to money and the fact that English football is swimming in it.
May I pose a different perspective in that the reason that we havenāt got enough English managers at the level required to take, on what is commonly accepted to be one of the most challenging roles in world football, is because English football is swimming in it.
Rewind 5-10 years and the argument was that English players werenāt on a par with other nations due to a lack of top level coaching and also limited first team opportunities at ātopā clubs due to imported players.
Subsequently top level coaches brought into the Premier League (at all levels, not just top 4/6 whatever) has raised the technical and tactical ability of English players. Also added to this is that English players are increasingly open to loan or permanent moves overseas to improve themselves.
UK coaches need to follow the example and move to clubs overseas to improve and develop their credentials. Rather than just look to prove themselves at an English Football League club then look for the big step up to a Premier League job.
Case in point being Potter forming his career overseas and he was the leading āEnglishā candidate for the National team job despite being unemployed for well over a year.
Itās classic āyou canāt have the big job until youāve proved you can do a big jobā scenario. So learn a new language and go and prove yourself overseas at a big club to give you big club credentials for a big Premier League job the taking the big England job.
Simples.
Brian BRFC (probably said ābigā too many times there but š¤·š¼āāļø)
We think Thomas Tuchel may have time to watch some England
A quick riposte to Steve Millsā assertion that being a German makes Tuchel an inappropriate choice because he wonāt have watched Englandā¦
I think we have to entertain the possibility that someone at the FA may have remembered to pop a tape in the recorder for each gameā¦
Hell, if heās lucky, they may have even let it run after some of those Nations League games on Channel 4 and they may have taped a few episodes of Gogglebox as well ā thatāll help him brush up on the English sense of humour and psyche at the same timeā¦
Iām sure that Tuchel has all the resources he needs to do his homework on the England squad.
Andy (MUFC)
ā¦surely Tuchel watched the Euros, he wasnāt working, had a big wedge of Bayern money in his back pocket. He is bound to have watched a few England games, maybe like the rest of us regretted it, but still.
Funny thing is the Germans quite like the English and wouldnāt mind if they do well. Either way he is renowned as being a meticulous manager, even if he is winging it he could have binged on the last 10 or so internationals before the interview. Maybe he played them at 2x and reckons it is a good tactic for the future, that alone would keep the masses happy and probably secured him the job.
Mel ā Dublin, Berlin, Athlone Town
ā¦Steve Mills makes a fully bizarre reason for not wanting Tuchel ā he wonāt have watched England play.
Has Steve not heard about the television, the way the vast majority of England fans will have watched? They do reruns and everything!
Couple that with extra footage I presume the FA would have from games that they could provide him, I am sure he will have plenty of opportunity to watch previous games and formulate some ideas.
Unless this was supposed to be humorous or something, itās ridiculous.
A, LFC, Montreal
Can you really limit where a coach works?
I see where Jonny Nichās coming from on homegrown managers. Iām Irish and would always like to see more invested in grassroots football and developing the Irish league and Irish coaches, and it stands to reason that stating that coaches have to also hold citizenship in the country they represent would presumably incentivise that (we have historically been quite reliant on the granny rule though, and I could see that still being the case with coaches.)
One of your other pieces mentioned that no one has a problem with a white guy managing an African team. Similarly, I think it would be great if football in the global south could be developed sufficiently for them to consistently, organically produce managers capable of competing in the World Cup. Though Iām not sure one (investment) necessarily follows the other (the change in rules.)
Admittedly, Iām not an expert on this, but I also wonder about the relative contract status of a player vs a manager at international level. Thereās no doubt the coaches are staff. But how is a player categorised? I donāt think they get paid beyond expenses etc. I can imagine they might be categorised more as ācompetitorsā than staff and that, if you tried to apply the same rule to coaches, that could be very tricky legally.
For example, if you introduced the rule right now or in the next year, I can imagine Tommy Tuchel might be taking you to court.
Finbar
ā¦Iām from the USA, which is relatively welcoming to foreigners, except for Irish and Chinese in the 19th century, Latinos in the 20th, anyone of color todayā¦um, where was I? Anyway, I donāt know a single USMNT soccer fan who isnāt happy to have a foreign coach if they can get us past the Round of F***ing 16, for crying out loud.
I do get the principle of ācoaches from your countryā in international football. But as many others have pointed out, that leaves the smaller nations, and those for whom football is still a minor sport, out of luck. So you canāt make a hard and fast rule.
At the same time, a true footballing nation the size of England should be able to find an excellent local coach. That they havenāt isnāt a sin, but it is an embarrassment.
At least in the USA the mouth-breathing right wing has little to say about the background of the manager. Thatās because most of them regard soccer as a girly sport anyway. But the howls will be audible in London if the USMNT is ever coached by a woman.
Peter G, Pennsylvania, USA (donāt be surprised if that day comes sooner rather than later)
National pride but only for the ātopā countries?
It took me a while to make up my mind on whether to send this email or not. You see, Lewis, after reading your mail, I went from nodding in agreement to rearing back in dismay at your surely āunknowingā but ultimately insulting conclusion.
Iām a Nigerian who has very recently moved to the US. I agree with your point in stating that the England should have an English coach. But I vehemently disagree in your analysis that England and other top teams should have a local coach BECAUSE theyāve got the best football infrastructure.
Your rationale already fails at the first test. England have picked Tuchel because, with respect to English coaches, there isnāt any truly elite English coach at the moment. Thereās a coaching deficit in England so, according to you, since England doesnāt have top coaching infrastructure or individuals, England doesnāt deserve an English coach.
I wonāt wade into the less-elegant ānational supremacyā angle any culturally humble reader will have sniffed from a mile away. Iām just going to conclude by suggesting you find more robust, less centrist rationales behind your point.
I do believe countries should have domestic coaches. Itās not compulsory though because any other reasoning besides national pride fails the logic test. (I hope to be proven wrong).
No country or group of countries deserve domestic coaches more than the others.
Otito, Illinois
35 years of hurt
I am a forty-two year old. I have supported Spurs and England, two teams with much in common, for thirty-five years. When Eriksson was appointed, I admit to having reservations, but I thought he deserved an open mind I have now reached a time in life where I donāt care who brings success. I may not have thirty-five more years. I want to win. Good luck, Tuchel!
Kind regards
S.E
