23 Brides Told The Stories Of How They Called Off Their Weddings (And Why), And Some Of These Are Absolutely Wrecking Me

We asked the brides of the BuzzFeed Community who called off their marriage on the wedding day (or very, very close to the wedding day) to tell us their stories and why they did it. Here are their shocking and heartbreaking stories:

Note: Some submissions are from this and this Reddit thread because they were too good to ignore.

“I called off my wedding one day before, for the only reason of the boy’s side not respecting my family. Every family has that member who can be obnoxious and just mean-spirited; it’s not the end of the world. But I am super protective of my entire family and listening to his father insult my folks was something I could not tolerate. Add to it, my ex never supported me, he never once told his dad to stop. He took his father’s side and supported the nasty stuff spoken of my family. So, I called it off! And I am happy I did so.”

“My family took a turn for the better. I am now happily married with 2 kids. And even if my husband and I do argue, we fully support one another.”

—53, New York

“My ex-fiancé and I had dated for three years, and were about to get married. Our wedding was in Vegas, a city we had nothing but happy memories of. The DAY before our wedding, while my fiancé was at his bachelor party, I got an alert on my phone from Capital One that said a charge had gone through for $200,000. Dazed, I immediately called my husband, who didn’t pick up the phone three times in a row. I tracked his location and saw that he was at a casino. I was furious.”

“When we met, he had a huge gambling problem, and through rehab and my support, he had managed to overcome it. He had called it his biggest accomplishment of his life, and the day before his wedding, he had undone all of his progress. On our wedding day, mere hours before we were supposed to say ‘I do,’ he confessed that he was drunk and had lost all of the money on a single game of roulette, and we were unable to refund any of it. I started crying and threw my ring at him. I booked the nearest flight home and then packed up all of my stuff from our house and moved in with my mom, who lived a few hours away. That was the last time I saw him, and I never wanted to see him again. Gambling ruins lives!”

—26, California

“My aunt decided one hour before showing up to City Hall that she would not get married. My parents told me the guy was really nice but very boring (she is not). She never regretted it, though she felt bad for the guy. A couple of weeks later, she just decided to take a hitch-hiking trip to Spain (from France) and she had a grand time. She was 20 or so. It took her twenty years to get her love life together in a satisfactory manner, but at least she did not have to go through years of boredom and a painful divorce.”

—u/Tryingalways

“I just panicked. I was way too young to get married (I was 22), and I didn’t really know the guy I was going to marry — who, by the way, was 10 years older than me. He seemed nice, but I hadn’t known him for more than three months. His family was really rude to me. They made a lot of rude comments about how they were from a much wealthier background than I was, and my fiancé may have been nice to me, but he didn’t defend me whatsoever against these classist remarks.”

“I felt like I had so much more that I wanted to do before getting married, so many more dates I wanted to go on. I wanted to one day marry a better man than him. I had to leave. So, I did. I wish things had ended more amiably, but I did what I had to do, and I’ve never regretted it.”

—73, New York

“I found out the day of my wedding while getting my makeup done that my soon-to-be husband was on Tinder. I found out because while GETTING READY FOR OUR WEDDING, he had matched with one of the guest’s cousins and was actively messaging her, trying to plan to see her before we went on our honeymoon! She just so happened to send the wedding guest a picture of him who immediately came and told me.”

“If she hadn’t sent that picture I would have 100% married him. I was so in love. I didn’t say anything to anyone other than my family, and I left. I sent my brothers to get my stuff and dogs from our shared house and never spoke to him again.”

—28, Maryland

“I found out on our wedding day that my husband-to-be was seeing someone else. He didn’t have the balls to tell me and was still going to go through with the ceremony. He thought he could just keep up with both relationships after we were married. His mom even tried to talk me into keeping up appearances for everyone’s benefit. She said that I needed to forgive and forget. I so dodged the intended bullet!”

“He did marry the other girl, and they divorced after a couple of years and two kids. I met my current husband six months after I called off my wedding, and he and I have been together for 26 years.”

—Anonymous, New York

“He told me that he always kind of wanted to sleep with my sister and I at the same time. No thanks, I don’t want to get involved with a guy like that for the rest of my life.”

—29, California

“I was about to make a huge mistake. I realized my fiancé was drinking too much, neglecting me emotionally, and was never actually there when I needed him (for example, a friend of mine died, and he didn’t want to go with me to the funeral because he had a Magic: The Gathering tournament). I was marrying the completely wrong man, and thank god I realized it before it was too late and was brave enough to call it off.”

“My family was super supportive, my super awesome grandmother took care of letting all the guests know. My dad had no problem with the money he lost in all the deposits. I gave my wedding cake to a homeless shelter since it was already paid for in full. Three years later, I married a wonderful man who is everything the first guy was not.”

—u/Sophie19

“I called off my wedding four days before the big day. Two of my bridesmaids (my best friend since high school and my cousin) got into a huge fight because they found out that he was sleeping with both of them. It was cheating within cheating and was easily the most surreal and heartbreakingly awful experience of my entire life.”

—u/throw_away_it

10.

“My fiancé had baggage. I knew that. I was going to be ok with becoming a stepmom to 3 children, a daughter-in-law to two crappy parents, and a sister-in-law to a stupid mess of a woman, and I knew that I would be bringing home the bacon. I even bought a house that would be big enough to house him and the three kids. But he told me he never married his baby momma and that he would leave my house at night for occasional night shift work as a cop. I asked to see the court decision regarding the kids, just so I knew what was going on. He kept the first page from me, which read “‘Divorce Decree.’ So when his parents made a ‘second marriage’ comment, I was thrown for a loop.”

“This was a pretty big thing to keep from your wife-to-be. I told him to leave, and he swore up and down that was the only thing he lied about. I called his ’employer,’ and it turns out he’s not a cop either. So I have NO IDEA where he went when he left the house that I was paying for, and I immediately went to get tested.”

—u/globalgrabass

11.

“I realized I was settling and that we both deserved better.”

“Within six months, K and I were dating, and we looked like the ‘perfect couple.’ Two young, attractive, blonde-haired, blue-eyed people; my family was ‘old money’ in my hometown, and he was a golden boy at our school. Our families eagerly anticipated our wedding but as the date grew nearer I started really thinking about our relationship — we barely agreed on fundamental things, we had serious communication issues, we just didn’t really get along that well. So, I called it off. I had to call the vendors and the million people involved with planning a wedding and explain how much we appreciated their help, but ‘We have decided as a couple not to go forward with our marriage.’ K was understandably upset/furious and hadn’t talked to me for almost a year. Then a few months later he randomly called me and explained how he finally understood I made the right decision, how we were better as friends and how we would have more than likely gotten divorced. There is a happy ending, though. I’m currently with another man who I now have a child with, and K and I remain very good friends.”

—u/Swtrbl555

12.

“Looking back at this I realized how huge of a bullet I dodged. Six months before my dream destination wedding cruise to New Brunswick, my significant other found his ‘soul mate’ on Yahoo chat. He eventually convinced her to visit, so this bitch bussed up to Erie, PA (his hometown) from some south state, where they proceeded to fuck each other’s brains out.”

“The sad/disgusting thing was that she knew the whole time he was engaged and the wedding was soon (and mostly paid for). He didn’t bother telling me the truth either; all he told me was, ‘I’m kinda stressed out right now, and I just want space.’ Being the good person that I am I gave him all the space he wanted and the only time we saw each other was during wedding planning times (I have no clue why he even bothered at this point). After a few weeks of this, he finally gets the balls to flat-out tell me it’s over, but he refuses to give me an explanation. He just says, ‘we grew apart,’ or some nonsense like that. I later find out all the gory details from his sister (who cheated on and left her husband a year or so later, guess it runs in the family). Unfortunately for him, they needed my signature to cancel the wedding plans, and his mom had paid for most of the wedding. I signed we parted ways, I cried for a long time, and we had a series of short and meaningless ‘relationships.’ My wounds healed, I got back to normal, and I went on with my life. During this whole time I realized I was bisexual and now I’m in a relationship with an awesome geeky gamer girl.”

—u/shinyjen

13.

“I had to call mine off because the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with (or so I thought) decided to sit me down the night before and tell me all about the trysts and flings he had been having throughout our relationship together. He said if he didn’t come clean now, he would not be able to live with himself. After the list was done, I was crying my eyes out. He said something along the lines of, ‘Well, I didn’t think you would take it THIS hard.’ Seriously.”

“We were going to have a huge wedding, even though I really didn’t want a huge one, so I had to call tons and tons of people and tell them it was off; listen to them try to console me over the phone, and crying every time I hung it up. He told me he didn’t want to call anyone because he was so upset with me calling it off. He didn’t want to see me ever again. That worked because I found someone who actually loves me, and we have been married for 3.5 years with a beautiful 2.5-year-old son. And he has never cheated on me. I never thought I could trust again, but I am still slowly getting over that fear after all these years.”

—flipflop979

14.

“I was about two months away from getting married to someone I had been living with for about a year. I was getting fitted for my wedding dress when I looked in the mirror and thought to myself ‘I really hope he and I can stay friends after we’re divorced.’ Then I thought, ‘Wait, did I really just think that?'”

“I got honest with myself and realized that, at most, I had lukewarm feelings for this guy and that I only had been thinking about the wedding day but not the marriage or the life we were going to live together. I was 21 and just wanted to get married without having really understood what that meant. I called it off, moved away, and met the love of my life three months later. We’ve been together for 11 years now, married for almost four, and are expecting our first baby this summer. Best decision I ever made!”

—u/musicalnix

15.

“I was in a relationship with a long-time BF (7 years) when we got engaged. I just finished school, and we had been together for so long, so it was the next step. I was really young when I met him so that gave him time to mold me to his preference. I often had to ‘dumb’ myself because he said I often offended him with my comments. And I did all that. I did not only because I viewed it as normal but also because I honestly and truly believed that this was IT, that I should take it because this was my only shot at being loved.”

“We got engaged and decided we were gonna get married in a year. A couple of months later, I found out he was cheating on me. We fight, he apologizes, I forgive him. He then proceeded to be a total shit for the next months, increasingly controlling and just being downright mean, and I took all this. I remember that I was out with him and some friends one night and he was particularly mean to me that day; we left and got on the car and I just started sobbing, and he apologized and I told him: ‘I always thought that when I got married I would be in love.’ And it was true, I did not love him anymore; I had fell out of love with him, slowly. And those words at that moment became the first step on the ladder to leave him.

I started feeling that there was life without him and then I found out that he had some loans he hadn’t told me about. And that was it. That was the last straw. Something I can’t explain came over me. I suddenly had the courage to leave him. I made up my mind. There was no more forgiving. I called it off. We broke up. This was the hardest thing I had to do in my life. This was me standing up for myself; this was me going against everyone in my life. Invites were sent, and places were booked. I DIDN’T GIVE A FUCK. My family was devastated, but I was happy. Oh, I was SO happy. And everyone was so mad at me because I was happy. But they didn’t know, they had no idea what I had been going through for the last few years, so they thought it was inappropriate for me to be so happy.”

—u/gallagirl

16.

“My best friend called her wedding off nine days before the big day. She discovered that he had emptied their joint wedding account playing online poker after he emptied his own personal account. She explained that the feeling of losing a down payment on a house, as well as the catering money, wasn’t anything compared to how she felt when he asked her for her inheritance from her mother (she had passed a year previously) to pay off more gambling debts. No apologies, just more money. She walked, and eight years later, she’s happily married to another guy with one boy and a bun in the oven!”

–u/cherbearblue

17.

“I called it off because I got a Facebook message from the girl he was sleeping with. Didn’t even believe her ’til she sent me detailed descriptions of MY house, complete with the color and pattern of my current bedsheets. Kicked his sorry ass out and kept the ring. Pawned that shit. Motherfucker was living rent-free in my house while I paid all the bills. Dumped his ass, lost 100+ lbs…Feels good, man.”

—u/allehcat

18.

“I called my first wedding off two days before it was supposed to happen because he was a dickhead and cheated on me three days before the wedding, and then he left me with our six-month old daughter.”

—Viktoralia

19.

“We found out I couldn’t have children, and he wanted to have children of his own and didn’t think adoption was a viable option.”

—u/Doctorchick

20.

“His sister was VERY involved in his life and our wedding planning, and she kinda became my de facto best friend. The morning of the wedding, I went to her place to pick up the bridesmaids’ gifts. As I was walking up to the door, I could clearly see her making out with someone in the front window. I remember thinking, ‘Good for her!’ because she hadn’t dated anyone during our four years together. I just let myself in, like always, prepared to tease her about her hookup. That is when I saw she was making out with my soon-to-be husband/her BROTHER! I didn’t say anything. I just turned and walked out.”

“I drove straight home to Denver (from California). I only told a few people why I bailed because I was embarrassed and didn’t think people would believe me. My friends and family were very upset with me for years. I finally found ‘the one,’ and everything worked out, but he and his SISTER are still both unmarried and now live together in Oregon. I never did figure out what was really going on with them.”

—32, Oklahoma

21.

“He nonchalantly told me on the drive to the church that if I ‘got fat’ after the wedding, he would leave me and never contact me again. I asked him to pull over, got out of the car, and walked to my mother’s house, where I explained the situation, canceled the wedding, and blocked him.”

—31, Illinois

22.

“I didn’t call it off the day before, but I’ve still called off a wedding. My boyfriend at the time proposed to me the summer before he left for medical school across the globe, and I was still finishing my last year of college. We were both making little-to-no money, and our respective families were going to have to straddle all costs. The stress of planning a wedding, trying to graduate, and holding it all together while I spoke to my S.O. only a few times out of the week eventually took its toll on me.”

“I cracked, and first cancelled the wedding and eventually broke it off all together. Life can take you in so many directions.”

—u/peeweekiwi

23.

“I caught my husband-to-be being intimate with my maid of honor (former best friend) on our wedding day. My friends tried to tell me, and I wouldn’t listen. What could either of them say? They were caught. I immediately went to my dad, calmly told him what happened, and then walked down the aisle by myself…and made an announcement to the invited guests that the wedding was off.”

“Then, I asked them to collect any gifts they brought and take them back as well as to enjoy the reception. Food, drinks, and cake already paid for. I then marched down the aisle and left for a solo honeymoon, which he’d fully paid for. Less than three months later he married her, and after two kids in three years, he left her for another girl.”

—55, USA

Responses have been edited for length/clarity.

Brides — and grooms — if you’ve ever called off a wedding last-minute, feel free to share your story in the comments below.