“Aging Has Checked My Ego”: Older Adults Reveal The “Humbling” Truths About Aging That Were Difficult To Accept

Aging is a privilege that not everyone experiences, but that doesn’t mean the process is always easy. Recently, redditor u/diplomaticorum asked the older adults of the Reddit community to share what they think are the hardest truths about getting older, and the responses were incredibly honest and insightful. Here are some of the biggest changes older adults have had to accept:

1.

“I’m not saying this in vain, but I think it’s incredibly difficult to lose your looks. Going from young and vibrant to old and haggard. Visually, you can see you’re getting old, even though you don’t feel old inside.”

2.

“Getting frustrated with everyday technology. Some days, I just want to throw my hands up in the air because nothing works right. Some things seem so overly complicated or just don’t make sense, and it infuriates me. I’m in IT, too, which doesn’t help and makes me feel like I’m just old and outdated. A forgotten repository of useless data.”

—u/DingGratz

3.

“Empty nesting. I know my kids have grown and have their own lives now, but I miss them living with me as a family unit on a daily basis so much.”

4.

“Pain. Things start hurting, and they never stop hurting. Every time another part of my body starts to hurt, for whatever reason, I wonder: Is this now forever? The worst part is that I have many friends my age who live similar lifestyles and engage in similar types of activities who do not experience the same pains. They just got better genes than I did, and there’s not a damn thing I can do about it.”

—u/catdoctor

5.

“Vision. Letters are too small on so many things.”

6.

“On some level, not being needed. I spent so much time taking care of my growing children, making professional decisions in my work life, and coming up with solutions to make systems better, and now I often feel hollow and useless. I want to know that I can help, not just be a token.”

—u/Photon_Femme

7.

“Decrease in stamina. Why is everything so tiring now?”

—u/EXXPat

8.

“The hardest thing to understand as it’s happening is that your circle of friends gradually grows smaller and smaller. They’re still your friends, and seeing them is like old times, but spending time with them gradually decreases to almost never. And these people, who were/are the most important people in your life for such a pivotal time, slowly begin to have other priorities like partners, families, work commitments, and general adulting. You grow up watching TV shows and see people in their 20s and 30s hanging out all the time and seeing each other daily, and you expect that to be your life. And it might be for a short time, but then people — as normal — pair up, no longer need roommates, get jobs in other cities, buy houses, get married, have kids, and so on.”

9.

“Menopause and all the shit no one warned me about — like losing your sex drive (which I’ve fortunately somewhat gotten back) and aging 10 years in six months. Oh, and waking up one morning to find I have NO eyebrows.”

—u/Bluesage444

10.

“The people I love won’t be around forever.”

11.

“I have noticed a change in my short-term memory over the past several months, and it’s concerning me.”

—u/WTFuckery2020

13.

“Loss of ambition and drive. Part of me kind of likes it because, deep down, I’m just a bum. But overall, it’s been tough to accept. It’s hard to describe, but you reach a point of just feeling finished with everything, and energy doesn’t come easy anymore. Unless I’m super stoked about something, I basically don’t care about it and can’t even force myself to pretend to care.”

14.

“When you are younger, it feels like you have all the time in the world to do things. I am now coming to terms with the fact that ‘someday’ is a lot smaller of a window.”

—u/Alternative_Sock_608

15.

“Loss of mobility due to disease. Retirement sucks if you can’t get around.”

16.

“That events and cultural references that you vividly remember are a lot older than you think, and in many cases, younger folks will have no idea what you are talking about.”

17.

“Realizing that the end is no longer over the horizon; it is the horizon.”

—u/S_L_Raymond

18.

Lastly: “I’ve been a personal trainer, marathoner, martial arts instructor, and yoga teacher since I was about 22. I’m 57 now. In my youthful, delusional mind, I truly thought I would be 80 before I started slowing down. Aging is humbling. We can exercise, eat right, and avoid most of the ‘bad’ stuff, but accidents happen. Genetics happen. Illness happens. I’m still very grateful that I’ve stayed fit throughout the years, but I was so sure that I would be a marathon-running grandma. Aging has checked my ego in a big way.”

If you’re an older adult, what difficult truth or change about aging was tough to accept? What made these truths easier to accept? If you want a chance to be featured in an upcoming BuzzFeed Community post, share your answer with us in the comments, or you can anonymously submit it using this form!

Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.