Hey, Love Is Blind Fans: Leave Dave’s Sister Alone
Love Is Blind fans, we need to have a little talk about Dave’s sister. Spoilers for episodes 1—12, ahead.
I have to admit, I giggled when the social media jokes about Dave Bettenburg’s relationship with his sister first started pouring in, poking fun at the sheer number of times he brought up his older sibling in the pods, often speaking of her like some sort of mafia don with the final word on Dave’s participation in the reality series.
I mean, even Netflix joined in, though I don’t think their compilation video actually included “every time” the unnamed sister was mentioned in the pods.
Jokes aside, Dave’s concern over his sister’s disapproval did not bother me. Especially given the loss of their mother, it made sense to me that Dave held her opinion in such high regard, though it seemed counterintuitive to go on the reality dating show despite her alleged protests. But hey, he’s a grown man who can make his own decisions, right? And honestly, the hints at codependency were pretty far down a long line of Dave’s red flags that popped up during the pods.
But things took a turn when Netflix began dropping the episodes set in Minneapolis, where Dave’s reluctance to introduce Lauren O’Brien to his family and friends felt like a weapon he forged to punish and demean the former teacher for a casual hookup she took part in prior to the show.
To recap: The moment Dave and Lauren returned from their honeymoon in Honduras, Dave’s phone began blowing up with friends and family alleging his new fiancĂ© entered the show with a boyfriend. And the alleged boyfriend wasn’t just any guy, it was someone on the outskirts of Dave’s social circle who lived in the apartment buildings where Love Is Blind would be filming the remainder of the season.
However, Lauren and her own friends held firm that the so-called relationship was a friends with benefits situation that was never serious. To this day, I have not seen any evidence (texts, photos, etc.) that would disprove her version of events—and you know how screenshots find their way onto the internet once a new season of Love Is Blind starts airing.
Throughout the entire drama, Dave went back and forth over his actual concerns, one minute questioning Lauren’s readiness for marriage so soon after a hookup, the next expressing displeasure over having to defend his fiancĂ© to his inner circle. Lauren, of course, just wanted to meet with them on or off camera to share her side of the story—an obvious solution he continued to rebuff.
“She’s my family. They don’t meet just anybody,” Dave had the gal to say to his fiancĂ© in episode 11. “I don’t want to waste her time either.”
It’s no surprise the pair ended their relationship one scene later, though it was absolutely diabolical of Dave to chastise Lauren’s dad for speaking to him “on his terms.”
It’s more than fair to declare Dave the villain of this season. What’s not fair is to put that same title on his sister and treat her as if they’re one in the same. Alas, that’s exactly what we’re seeing online.
It’s particularly concerning to see respected publications brag about finding Dave’s sister through his Instagram account, while fans on TikTok share her name, photos, and personal IG page, which has been set to private. I will not be linking to any of these posts to preserve her privacy, but one TikTok user, who has since deleted their video, captioned their exposĂ©, “Devil reveal.”
Can we not?
Throughout the series, Dave deflected and contradicted himself whenever his actions were questioned. A prime example is his final (possibly drunken) conversation with Lauren in episode 11, when he seemingly attempts get back together with his former fiancĂ©. The second Lauren claims he never reached out after the breakup, he gave her the old, “You didn’t text me either.” Once she pointed out that he’s the one who would need to show some effort, he agreed, adding, “that’s what I’m trying to tell you.”
This man is not to be trusted, so why are we trusting anything he tells us about his sister? One moment, she and Dave’s friends are the reason he can’t get past Lauren’s sexual history, but then Lauren says he never even gave his sister the letter she wrote to her. Did he ever try to sway their opinions at all?
“My friends and family would have been here if I really wanted them here,” Dave tells Lauren during their breakup. “They would have showed up for me.” If that’s the case, Dave’s sister was just another excuse he used to get out of a relationship he didn’t want to be in.
For all we know, Dave’s sister didn’t want him on the show because she knew he’d expose his own poor behavior. After all, he’s the one who admitted to being “an ass” to women and struggling with “integrity” in the pods. Of course, we don’t know because she’s not the one who signed up to be on a reality show.
All we know is what Dave tells us—and yes, he’s still talking about his sister in interviews. “The further along we get in the show, it’s hard for her to watch how difficult it was for Lauren to go through the process and see how much it was weighing on her,” he recently told Vulture. “She obviously feels bad about that. Honestly, it’s been hard for me to relive those moments, too.”
It’s downright gross and low-key dangerous to blame this woman for her brother’s actions, especially when people who are villainized on social media can face real world consequences like loss of employment and damaging digital footprints.
So please, stop posting her private Instagram on social media, don’t contact her job, and keep the incest jokes to your group chat. Let her exist privately in the ether as she so clearly desires. After all, she was right: Dave never should have gone on the show.
