“I Didn’t Find Out Until The Baby Was A Year Old”: People Are Sharing How They Discovered Their Partners Were Cheating On Them, And I’m In Disbelief

At least for me, cheating on your partner is one of the most egregious things one can do to someone they claim to love. To prove my point, Redditor u/jfunks69 asked Reddit community members to share how they found out they were getting cheated on, and…wow. Here are some of the most shocking stories:

“The girl purposefully hid her lipstick in his car so that I could find it.”

“Things weren’t going well. We tried counseling, but we didn’t improve. After some months of scratching my head about why we couldn’t make things work, I decided to end things before it got really ugly. I moved out a couple of weeks later. One week to the day after I moved out, her new beau moved in. Her stained-glass tutor. He had left his wife and month-old baby to do so.”

—ample_space

“I was on FaceTime with her mother, showing off our newborn, when the messages started popping up on the iPad.”

—m4dch3mist

“A friend of the person he was cheating on me with sent me screenshots of them together that his affair partner posted on Instagram. That’s also how I found that his ‘work trips’ were actually excuses for him to cheat on me.”

“My best friend sat me down with a couple of beers and a cheese plate, and he told me that she had been sneaking around with some guy she worked with. When I confronted her, she said it was because I wouldn’t commit to marrying her. We’d only been dating for three months.”

—TheRealJackReynolds

“I came home from deployment, and some dude was living in my house.”

—Lsufaninva

“While I was tucking my kid in bed one night, she said, ‘I don’t want a new daddy; I love this daddy.’ I dug around and found it all out.”

—2_alarm_chili

“I got a Facebook message from a friend that started with, ‘Please don’t hate me, but…’ She proceeded to tell me that my boyfriend, whom I’d been dating on and off for two years, was dating her other friend. She realized it was the same guy when I posted pictures of us on vacation. He had always been super weird about me not tagging him in pics. Of course, I thanked my friend and told her to tell the other woman I wasn’t mad, and to call me ASAP. My phone rang two minutes later, and we instantly aligned with one another and compared notes on that lying liar. He, of course, told both of us that the other one was stalking him. We both kicked him to the curb and have stayed friendly to this day.”

—theelephantupstream

“He told me — after he’d fathered a child after a one-night stand. I didn’t find out until the baby was a year old, and he was being sued for child support. I left him the next day.”

10.

“A sex worker had sent me a LinkedIn message because he had walked out without paying.”

—Just-Wolf3145

12.

“With one guy, I Googled him and found an article with pictures of his wife reading a children’s book she had written about a story that he had told me on our first date. The article referenced their happy family; she had the same first name I did. With a more recent ex, I saw the other woman on the security camera in my home while I was out of town. I’d had suspicions, so I set the alarm to notify me when the front door opened.”

—ekcshelby

13.

“Her cellphone went from having no password, being left everywhere, and asking me to check it on her to a locked screen, having no notification sounds, and her getting out of the shower midway because she ‘accidentally left her phone away from her.’ I initially just thought this was an odd change. At the same time, she’d started texting me to pick the kids up from the babysitter after I was done working due to her having an ‘appointment.’ I didn’t finish work until three hours after her, and doctor appointments didn’t happen at that time of day. The proof came when she saved intimate photos of herself and the other person, which were automatically uploaded to our computer.”

14.

“I found Grindr installed on my ex-husband’s phone. He told me after I had our baby that I wasn’t attractive to him anymore, and that, sometimes, he just really wanted to suck a dick. He said that since I didn’t have one, it wasn’t fair of me to stop him.”

—Zylix_Morningstar

15.

“When I called the coroner to find out the cause of death, they said that, though the toxicology report wasn’t back, they assumed it was an overdose. When I asked why, they said the report stated that a witness saw him take pills. I asked, ‘What witness?’ They said, ‘His girlfriend.'”

—yeahtessa

16.

“He just ghosted me after a year and a half. I called my best friend of 20 years, sobbing — the girl I met at 6 and went through every phase of childhood and adulthood with. And she didn’t pick up or return my call. On day three, I sat up, electrified. It was her. I drove to his house, and there was her car. Dick is abundant and low value, so I wasn’t missing the cheating piece of shit. But there’s no replacing a best friend from childhood. And the betrayal was compounded by his mom living across from me and seeing them together at her house daily. Fifteen years later, everything is so good. I have an amazing best friend who feels like a sister, and I have the most amazing husband and two kids. They both flamed out, and last I heard, he was buying dick pills in Mexico and selling them to his friends. She’s unemployed with three DUIs.”

—Frostyarn

17.

“He walked past me with a baby stroller.”

18.

“He asked our 21-year-old daughter to help him with an email. When she started typing in the recipient’s name, other emails with the same name popped up. She’d noticed that some emails were replies to a post on a dating site. Later, she looked in his browser history and saw multiple sex worker sites. She told me, and I looked at his bank accounts (we’ve always kept them separate, but I have the passwords). I found cash withdrawals of $600–$1,000 per week, and phone records that showed hundreds of texts and calls to escorts. I confronted him. He admitted to everything, but he didn’t apologize for the lying or cheating. He suggested marriage counseling; I filed for divorce.”

—Calm_Depth_110

19.

“One day, she broke up with me over text for no apparent reason after three years of lovin’. One night, I was out on a long walk to go smoke, and I found her in her car with the second man, doing the deed. I later found out that she had done it more than once while we were together, with multiple people. I started scrambling to get myself tested. Rough shit, but oh well. What are ya gonna do.”

—BrainlessTay

20.

“He was showing me pictures on his phone, and I swore I saw a vagina. He quickly put the phone away and acted like I didn’t see anything. The next day, I went to our home computer and looked at the trashed photos. It was heartbreaking; it felt like the rug was pulled completely out from under me. He hadn’t realized his phone was synced to our computer.”

—Ok-Change6854

21.

Lastly: “I watched it. I’d known her for 15 years; she had catered our wedding. I’d been with him for six years when we got married, and she’d known him for less than a year. The pandemic hit, and suddenly, he was worried about her because she lived alone (she lived with her 17-year-old daughter). She’d invite us to lunch, and he’d just leave without me. Basically, they were making every excuse to be together without me. Finally, she came to our house and was so dismissive of everything I said that I left the room. No one came to check on me; he left me a few days later. We had been married for eight months and had just bought a house. When they finally got together, it lasted only six or eight weeks. I could have told them they were poorly matched. He’s back living with his mother, where I found him.”

Honestly, I’m at a loss for words. If you’ve ever been cheated on, how did you find out? Let us know in the comments, or you can anonymously share your story using the form below.

Note: Some stories have been edited for length and/or clarity.