Next Chelsea manager: Cesc Fabregas, Emma Hayes and John Terry follow sacked McKenna

It’s been less than a week since Mauricio Pochettino was shown the door by Chelsea and we’re already bored of reports of replacement manager talks, compensation packages and hijacks.

Given the Todd Boehly-Clearlake Capital owners have already burned through three permanent managers in two seasons, and clearly don’t know their arse from their elbow when it comes to running a football club, it won’t be long before they’ll be needing a replacement for Pochettino’s replacement and a replacement for his replacement’s replacement and so on.

In that spirit, we’ve had a go at predicting the next six managers of Chelsea Football Club, starting with Kieran McKenna and ending with a couple of Proper Chels lads in tandem fighting to get the Blues into the Championship play-off places.

1st) Kieran McKenna

It might be Enzo Maresca instead of McKenna, but either would represent an appointment fitting the Chelsea owners’ current flight of fancy.

‘The club is determined to bring in a young, talented head coach who can grow with the club and develop a lengthy career,’ a report claims, indicating a desire remarkably similar to that which led to the appointment of their second permanent manager in September 2022.

‘Graham Potter was identified as a young, progressive, innovative appointment designed to lead a long-term strategy,’ it was revealed at the time. How did that go, lads?

Chelsea will play some pretty stuff under McKenna, but he will make the grave error of being far too amiable with the media and nowhere near shouty enough on the touchline for the Blues fans, who will question whether he has enough passion for the club, with standout wins over rivals for the European spots not enough to caveat his weak demeanour. Gone by Christmas.

READ MORE: Chelsea: Underwhelming contenders to replace Mauricio Pochettino headed by McKenna

2nd) Ruben Amorim

After rising star Potter came experienced operator Pochettino: a wise head to guide a young team, much like Thomas Tuchel, you might say. But let’s not get bogged down in past mistakes – this is about the future, and all those delicious mistakes to come.

In a bid to follow their winning strategy of replacing an inexperienced manager with an experienced one (at least relatively), the Chelsea board will pay the ÂŁ20m-odd required to pinch Amorim away from Sporting Lisbon.

Who will have been rubbish by the way, as Amorim’s head is turned to the extent that he will barely have been watching their games on the touchline, with his private plane continually taxiing the runway in preparation for its next flight to London.

He will have been closely studying the Chelsea squad in the months leading up to the appointment and overthink his way through the rest of the season, playing Mykhaylo Mudryk at wing-back and Reece James as a holding midfielder.

They’ll finish out of the European spots, and good thing too as Chelsea will have flouted FFP rules to the extent where they couldn’t afford to compete in the Europa Conference League in any case, with sanctions doled out over the summer meaning they start the 2025/26 season with a 10-point deduction.

Amorim wants out but also wants the hefty compensation that Chelsea can’t afford to pay. Things turn sour on and off the pitch and ten games into the season they agree to mutually terminate the head coach’s contract with the Blues at the foot of the table having only just made it into the black.

3rd) Cesc Fabregas

The Chelsea hero answers the call with Frank Lampard-esque “I had no choice – it’s my club” vibes, much to the displeasure of Arsenal fans, who nevertheless have the joy of watching their side hit six past the Blues in Fabregas’ opening game.

The Spaniard had built up quite the reputation as a deep-thinking tactician at Como, who finished mid-table in their first season back in Serie A. And three inauspicious months at Stamford Bridge have no effect on his standing as one of the brightest young minds in world football with everyone now in agreement that managing Chelsea is an impossible job.

Goes on to manage Barcelona and win it all.

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4th) Cole Palmer

A true test of the question: ‘Is there anything he can’t do?’ Having won the Premier League Player of the Season in 2024/25 after contributing to 40 of Chelsea’s 60 top-flight goals, and after his proposed transfer to Real Madrid fell through on the final day of the summer 2025 transfer window, Palmer is named player-manager for the final few months of the 2025/26 season.

“Why look elsewhere when we can appoint from within?” Boehly is quoted as saying. “Cole has shown himself to be an outstanding professional; all we’re asking is that he does a bit more of that outstanding work off the pitch as well as on it.”

But in a bid to save himself for the World Cup with England and to ensure his move to the Bernabeu doesn’t fall through for a second time, Palmer elects to start himself in less than half of the remaining fixtures, citing various injuries and illnesses as reasons for his absence, and Chelsea are relegated to the Championship.

READ MORE: Premier League team of the season features Arsenal trio but no Saka or Odegaard

5th) Emma Hayes

Boehly and Behdad Eghbali have been advised to stay away from Stamford Bridge and the surrounding area amid threats from Chelsea fans and various marches and demonstrations against their ownership of the football club, with unflattering effigies adorning the Fulham Road.

The financial breaches, high manager turnover and obsession with the failing project has turned them into a laughing stock in the media, and in a desperate bid to appeal to the wokery of the left-leaning publications they approach club legend Emma Hayes to take over the men’s team and earn them promotion straight back to the Premier League.

“We believe Emma is the best human being for the job,” Boehly says, rather on the nose, from a video-link in New York.

Hayes does well with what is now a threadbare squad as assets are sold by the owners in a desperate bid to avoid administration, and they’re pushing for automatic promotion before she’s shown the door for calling co-sporting directors Laurence Stewart and Paul Winstanley “a pair of useless pr*cks”.

Talking of which


6th) John Terry and Frank Lampard

Fortunately for John Terry, who failed to make the interview stage in his five previous attempts to become Chelsea manager due to his puzzling use of Comic Sans in his application, no interview was required on this occasion due to what the Chelsea website described in their announcement of his appointment as ‘a stunning lack of interest in the role’.

Terry was granted his every wish as manager and club legend, the first of which saw him bring in Lampard – out of work since he last left Chelsea in 2023 – as his joint manager, much to the surprise of the board members, who later informed Terry that he would have to split what was an already modest salary down the middle.

“He made more in his swimwear company that went down the drain,” Lampard quipped. “But no seriously we both would have done this for nothing, we’re looking forward to getting Chelsea back in the Premier League.”

But they don’t. Comfortably second when they arrive midway through the season, Chelsea cling to a play-off spot, make the final but lose, with Terry lifting up his suit trousers at Wembley and unstrapping his shinpads in his final act as joint Chelsea manager.

Lampard remains, but is demoted to interim boss.

READ NEXT: John Terry accepts he’ll never be Chelsea boss in dream-crushing realisation that ‘really hurts’

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