What Was Whitney Cummings Even Talking About in Her Red-Pilled Roast of 2024?

Whitney Cummings sure has a lot of opinions. The comedian raised eyebrows and sparked questions while appearing on CNN’s live New Year’s Eve broadcast hosted by Andy Cohen and Anderson Cooper, closing out her set with a red-pilled roast of 2024.

During her pre-roast interview with Cohen and Cooper around 10 p.m. on Tuesday, Cummings dropped hints that she was about to rip into the left. She joked about CNN’s dwindling viewership, then spoke about her new gig hosting a Friends-themed quiz show on Max. “There’s this new thing where everything in Hollywood has to, like, lecture people how to vote and make you feel guilty about global warming,” she said. “It’s just a fun show.” Cohen then asked the 2 Broke Girls cocreator where she’d be watching the ball drop, and Cummings revealed she had no real plans. “After what I’m about to do, I think I’ll probably be, like, in a huddle with a bunch of lawyers,” she quipped.

And then her roast began. Cummings kicked it off by saying that she planned to hold 2024 accountable for its actions. “That is what white women do now—we point out other things that are toxic, ’cause we don’t get irony,” she said. “And that is our truth.” She joked about the WNBA, cryptocurrency being “astrology for men,” and America’s fixation on murderers. “[Luigi Mangione] is now in the same prison as Diddy, which I’m very upset about, ’cause Luigi already has a lower-back issue,” said Cummings of the alleged UnitedHealthcare CEO killer, prompting a shocked reaction from Cohen as Cooper remained stoic.

She also got overtly political, taking shots at Kamala Harris’s presidential campaign, Hunter Biden’s laptop, and Joe Biden’s age. “The Democrats couldn’t hold a primary ’cause they were too busy holding a body upright,” she said. After apparently checking to see if her feed had been cut, Cummings asked, “Are we still rolling? Am I off?” “Go for it!” replied a laughing Cohen.

A nervous-seeming Cummings continued: “It was amazing that the pro-choice party didn’t give their voters one when it came to the presidential candidate. Kamala was forced on us so hard, you’d think she was patented by Pfizer,” she said. “Oh God. Andy just gave me a very scary look,” Cummings added, though Cohen denied having done so.

Cummings ended her roast by parroting dubious right-wing talking points at warp speed. Rapid fire, Cummings brought up the drones in New Jersey; Thomas Crooks, the shooter behind the first Donald Trump assassination attempt, who allegedly did not own any silverware; Disney having received funding from Saudi Arabia; and the Boy Scouts of America changing its name. “I can’t believe you guys are still letting me go. This is amazing. I love CNN,” Cummings said as she finished. She then threatened to continue before Cohen finally cut Cummings off with a “Happy New Year.”

Since the roast, Cummings has been incredibly vocal on X, explaining why she was so rushed at the end—and sharing more questionable claims. “This is what I said at the end of my roast set on CNN tonight that I zoomed through beacause I was running out of time (and scared),” she wrote. “Since I only have a minute left and I’m live on an establishment media, I figured I’d list some of things mainstream media will never cover: The first trump shooter didn’t have any silverware in his house, The Crown prince of Saudi Arabia put money into Disney, why is fluoride still in our water? Monsanto paid Google to skew search results, why are so many presidents chefs dead?”

Cummings has since tweeted out more “cut for time” jokes about Harris and the Paris Olympics.

“A lot of what I talked about on CNN last night regarding our brains breaking was inspired by touring the country and trying to ‘do my own research’ in terms of peopels realities without judgement,” she posted on X. While Cummings seems quite confident in her own “research,” her sources might differ from those of CNN. Cooper, at least, seemed unfazed by her on-air remarks: “I only understood, like, half the references,” he said.